“I put a tester bottle of my first batch of kombucha into the fridge, thereby ending fermentation and cooling the contents. Opening a warm bottle could result in the kind of spewage of a beer can taken from a paint can shaker at the hardware store (à la Bart Simpson). Or so the alarmists say. So, I have forced myself to wait until the tester is completely chill. No amount of alternate-nostril breathing can dampen my effervescence anxiety.”
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